Have you ever realized something that is so obvious it's embarrassing? It has come to my attention that I strive to be feisty and I have a keen liking for feisty women.
Uhhhmmm... I guess anyone that knows me would realize this to be true. I, however, have never named this particular trait in myself. I guess it has been brought to my attention whenever I lay eyes on one particular precocious 3 year old in my life.
Mya is feisty. I thought she and I would butt heads and have a lot of trouble connecting. I am pleased, and relieved to report that every time Mya shows spirit, backbone and fire, I love it. It may be challenging to respond to, but I am always so pleased to see it.
Every time I display any strong, clear behaviour, I am empowered. Feisty is only good in my books.
Having given voice to this unknown, but obvious truth, I can now see how I am drawn to friends who show spirit and spunk. I am connected to female singers/songwriters who are unapologetically strong (Zoe Lewis is a fav). I tend to read mysteries with female main characters that are quirky and not given to sugarcoat. (i.e. Maisie Dobbs). Feisty woman are usually funny too.
I think that feisty-ness can be seen a mile away in a woman. It shows up in how she holds her shoulders, how straight her spine, how firm her step. It is apparent in her tone and word choice. But, most importantly, it is in the twinkle or the flash of her eye. I think both Mya and I can communicate quite a bit without opening our mouths. Ticked or tickled - our eyes show it. My Grandma McGrath was the same way and I see her in Mya's eyes all the time.
I realize that this trait is not always easy to handle. Feisty means the emotional may overrule the rational. It may mean stubborn refusal to be wrong. I get that ... but I still say I'd rather have feisty over pliable, outspoken over silent and clear over confused.
Spunk brings with it a whole host of problems, but everyday I seek to cultivate it in myself, guard it in my daughter and discover it in the world at large. I swear, if the world were run by feisty women, it would be an amazing place.
One day last year at playschool Mya threw a massive fit in the hallway and the Director, bless her heart, explained to a judgmental passerby that they may well be observing the first female President. I'm glad she appreciates a feisty woman. I know I do. Here's to all the feisty women in my life!